THINKING CAPS

You’ve probly noticed my favorite quote down there on my side bar…

“The only true currency in this bankrupt world… is what you share with someone else when you’re uncool.” ~ Lester Bangs

Tell me what this means to you.

SLACKER WEEKEND

I’m trying to take it kind of easy this weekend, dreading gearing up for working 4 ten-hour days this week. You might not see that as a major feat yourself, but for moi, getting up at 4:30 in the morning is something akin to having major dental work or trying to get a trial subscription canceled with a music site that starts with an e (which I’ve neglected to post about due to the overwhelming anxiety of the whole situation which is really too time-consuming to post about but which has FINALLY been resolved, thank gawd, courtesy of a dude named Miles to whom I am presently considering proposing marriage…)

So I didn’t do any yard work this weekend, didn’t dust and vacuum, barely did laundry. Instead I blogged and watched movies. It’s called “Being Kind to Me.” Today I am going dress-shawpin’ for something to wear to a wedding next weekend because I’m fat now and can’t fit into anything nice that I own. I’m not happy about the prospect for two reasons: 1) I’m cheap and don’t get off on blowing money on something that I will rarely wear and 2) It doesn’t fit into my plan for “Being Kind to Me”as it involves actually leaving the sanctuary of my home and facing the public. Oh yeah, and it’s chilly and gloomy out there.

The movies I watched were 27 Dresses and In The Name of the King. The first was cute but mildly disappointing. It had it’s moments. The best part was getting to look at James Marsden’s ugly mug. The second was great. If you like violence and magic. There was good drama, some great sword wielding and some humor. The acting was acceptable. PD watched it no less than 5 times. Guess he’s having a “Be Kind to Me” weekend, too. He claims that if you like LOTR, you will like this. I would recommend it. Kevlar will say it’s crap. ;-P

If you happen to  notice that there overabundance of text under my Recent Comments… That’s SUPPOSED to be my last.fm widget which promises to play some great tunes for you, my beloved reader.  Anyone who can tell me where I f***ed up how to make that work, I’d be eternally grateful…

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Update: Lawgirl ~aka CrazyChick~ has “come out” to me, confessing that she’s reading my blog From The Beginning (hence my new nickname for her) She brought to my attention this post from a couple of years ago which I read and thought was entertaining and well- written (ha) and decided to share it with you once more. Thanks, CC.

FRIDAY TUNE 4 U

The Epochs ~ Love Complete music video

Check this out. I love it!

MY BABY GIRL (AND HERS)

My daughter “Jujubee” Jenny is 30 another year older today. Saturday, Miss Madeline turned 3. I just want to wish them both Happy Birthdays and let them both know that they are the two most beautiful young ladies in the whole, entire world and I love them with all my heart and soul.

WHERE DID IT GO?

Ten years ago today, my father died. It’s very, very hard for me to believe that it has been ten whole years that I’ve been rattling around in this world without listening to his jokes or seeing his handsome face.

One of my favorite things in the whole world was watching my dad being all serious-like, usually giving my mom a hard time about something or other. He would catch my eye and give me a quick wink and a barely- perceptible nod which meant, “Let’s see how long I can keep her going.” The longer it went on and the more riled Mom would get, the harder time he would have keeping a straight face. He would stifle a chuckle and his shoulders would start heaving up and down before he would let out a laugh. When my mom would realize he was pulling her chain she would get all the madder. I was always torn, whether to side with my mother or join in the laughing with my dad and risk pissing Mom off even more. I’m sorry, Mom, for all those times I just couldn’t help laughing. It was such a great feeling to share that little joy with my dad. He took so much pleasure in getting a rise out of you. And yeah, maybe he got a few too many chuckles at your expense, but, damn. That was how he was. It was one of his lop-sided ways of showing you how much he loved you.

It was hard for my dad to express love. He was 3 years old when his own mother died. He was raised by relatives and worked very hard for everything he ever got. The story of how he and his brothers each received a single, white dress shirt as their Christmas presents tears me up when I think of it. It totally humbled me when I learned that applesauce was a rare and special treat at their dinner table and was dished out sparingly. As I got older, it made more sense to me that my dad was a proud man and expected my sister, four brothers and I to take care of and respect our possessions. I don’t ever remember being denied a single thing I asked for as I was growing up. In return, we were expected to do our best, respect our elders and go to church every Sunday. In retrospect, that was not a lot to expect for all he gave us in return. While he was not a terribly affectionate man, his actions spoke volumes about how much we were loved.

And he was good. And he was honorable. And he was funny.

I’m not going to go on. I could for pages and pages, but I want to leave you with this. If you are lucky and your own father is still in your life, love the hell out of him, faults and all. There very well could come a time when you would give everything you own just to have his arms around you one more time…

… or in my case, hear him say, “I love you, too, Wink.”

TULIPATHY?

So the other day I was walking around the yard with my camera, taking pictures of my tulips. The orange and yellow ones, at least. I thought a nice Spring flower picture would cheer up the look of the old blog.  Well, of course I never got around to getting the pictures out of the camera.
But here’s when things took a turn for the weird. It was the day I posted my horoscope. That seems to be the day-or the first time that I noticed- that WordPress started listing “possibly related posts” at the end of a post. When I saw it, and it wasn’t even on the main page, it was on my dashboard. I clicked on this link. What I saw there was a Pisces horoscope and I was thinking it took me to my own page and my own horoscope. Imagine my surprise when I saw my tulips that I’d only been thinking about uploading. I was like Holy Crap, WordPress is magic! My brain went inside out before I realized that there was another blog out there (Hi Lawgirl!) with a Pisces horoscope and yellow and orange tulips. I guess, though, that you would have had to have spent some time inside my head to fully grasp the freak factor when I saw that page.  And yes, of course I noticed that Lawgirl’s  tulips are sharper and clearer than mine.  Shut up.

CHANGE, CHANGE, MORE CHANGE

I’m so excited. Last night was the first time this year that I was able to go to sleep with the windows open and oh my goodness, I love that so much! I woke up with the early morning sun shining in my face, the birds singing and the sweet smells of freshly cut grass hanging in the air. My house smells so fresh and clean and I feel like Life is All Good. And I slept like a baby

And Sweet Madeline is 3 years old today.

The announcement was made at work last week that our company is switching to a 4-day work week. This was brought up previously, due to about 50% of the workers wanting an extra day off to enjoy the summer. A vote was taken and the idea was scrapped. Now, due to rising gas prices and the general state of the economy, the company has decided that this will be a more cost-effective benefit. Personally, I despise the idea of spending 10 hours at work 4 days a week but I’m keeping an open mind and hoping that I can keep caught up on my sleep enough to actually enjoy the extra day off. I don’t particularly mind working until 4:30 instead of 3:30 but getting up at 4:30 am does not thrill me, not a bit. I was just getting used to driving to work with the sun coming up. So we shall see. There are so many pros and cons, I will try to concentrate on the pros.

Want to share a funny little story that happened last weekend on the way home from NY. PD and I stopped to “gas up” at a little station/store before we left. PD went in to pay and I decided to run in and grab snacks for the ride home. My total came to $6 and some change. I had a wad of one dollar bills in a side pocket in my purse and pulled them out and was counting them out on the counter when the cashier started to chuckle and said “You gave me your fortune.” Several responses went through my head and when I was deciding what to say back to him, I looked down at the bills and saw a little white piece of paper on the pile, which was indeed, from a Chinese fortune cookie. Hehe.

MY TODAY

≈You probably aren’t going to feel very social today, dear Pisces. In fact, you’re likely to want to work on projects and tasks alone if you can. This actually might be good for you, as you probably need to concentrate on crossing certain things off your list without being distracted. Still, you should get out among others at some point during the day. You might want to be alone, but you’ll still need to feel that you belong. ≈

This was my dead-on horoscope for today and I only just now read it. But that’s usually how I read them; after the fact. That way, I know my actions on any given day aren’t influenced by a thought planted in my head and plus I get the added kick of seeing that mostly they’re pretty accurate. For me anyway.

So, as reported up there, I was wantin’ to be left alone today. Didn’t happen, which made that yearning all the more keen. I had two projects to accomplish at work today. Put the ear buds in and went at it. On breaks I went outside and soaked up as much sun as possible. Spent time thinking of what I needed to accomplish at home this evening and made a mental list. When I got home I dug in and took care of 8 or 10 of those. I did take time to sit on the porch for a little while, where I made a couple of phone calls I’d been putting off. PD got dinner and we sat down to watch Bridge to Terabithia, or the second half of it, since we watched the first half yesterday. I’d intended to watch it last week with Julian and never got to it.

While we dined and watched, a pretty substantial rain shower was going on outside. One single thunderclap and it was over. We finished the movie and dinner. I blew my nose and cleared my head from the profuse weeping (Thanks, Walt Disney) and went back to the porch and was astounded by how the rain transformed our backyard into a beautiful green paradise. The buds on the trees opened in less than two hours time! There must have been magic in that rain!

Either that or Terabithia did a number on my (already child-like) imagination. A kid’s movie for sure, but I came away feeling a surge of hope and creativity and a sense of wonder. I know this sounds hokey, but I ain’t lyin’ to ya. I can’t explain how beautiful the yard looks right now. The sunlight is shining through the rain-soaked leaves, the tulips and daffodils seem brighter and everything is green and shiny. It all has a kind of glow. It even smells wonderful and fresh. The birds must have noticed it too, they’re singing like crazy.

Ok, so my horoscope is a little off… I don’t need to get out among people to feel like I belong. Standing on my porch just then, taking in all the beauty in my own little corner of the world is the most belonging feeling I’ve felt in quite some time.

Going back there now… Wish you could join me : )

OBSERVATIONS

Having traveled to NY to see the kids this past weekend, there are a few things I’ve noticed and feel compelled to share with y’all. Some are personal, some are universal. Any offenses are purely coincidental and (of course) not intentional.

• People who drive Dodges are the slowest drivers in the world. No. Wait. Let me clarify. I should maybe rephrase… Of all the slow drivers that I encounter in my travels, the highest percentage of them are behind the wheel of some sort of a Dodge vehicle. (the highest percentage of that percentage just happen to be male.) There, was that better? The worst and slowest driver I encountered this weekend, however, was neither. It was a woman driving a mint green Toyota, in the passing lane going sixty for miles and miles and promptly pissing off every other driver on the entire highway. Frankly, I would love to be the one to tell her that she’s damn lucky to be alive at this point. Grrrr.
• The quality of the toilet tissue in the restrooms on the Interstates in New York is far superior to that of the tissue in Pennsylvania.
• The chances of encountering an English-speaking person in a restroom on the Interstates in New York are lower than the absorbency rating of PA toilet tissue in a restroom on an Interstate.
• The self-flushing toilets on any of these Interstates should be required by law to come equipped with hearing protection.
• Missouri license plates are pretty.
• Anyone familiar with the Angola NY rest stop will know that you park on one side of the highway and walk over the 4-lane highway in an enclosed walk-way to reach the food/potties/etc. It doesn’t matter if you are traveling North or South. I witnessed a purple-haired, highly-tattooed, twenty-something girl come out of the walk way and approach the parking area. It wasn’t particularly crowded and didn’t take her long to realize that her car was nowhere in that lot. She looked rather disgusted when she commented to me that she must have come out the wrong side. I wonder how often that happens? And no, I haven’t done it yet. Shut up.
• Highway patrol officers seem to pull over more brightly-colored vehicles. Assumably for speeding. Maybe for clashing with the scenery, I dunno.
• It freaks me out, driving on a bridge over a lake when you look off to the side and the water appears to be higher than the road. What the hell is up with that?
• Black Volvo station wagons are cool as heck.
• There was a $0.15 toll increase on a road that is in worse condition than it was when the toll was $0.15 cheaper.

We had lots of fun with the kids. We celebrated Maddie’s 3rd Birthday and she looks awesome in the sunglasses and boa that her Nana (that would be moi) gave her. She kept “going to school” wearing the glasses and the Elmo backpack that was a gift from PD. Her favorite expression seems to be “Are you kidding me???”

Bad news is that the record store that I fell in love with earlier this year has closed it’s doors. That really bummed me out. I hate that phrase, but I was bummed, nonetheless. They were a little pricey but had a really great selection. Dammit.

One more thing. On the road, we were coming up behind a truck with a huge “thing” tethered down in the bed of the truck. This is the ensuing conversation between PD and I:

Me: What the hell is that thing? A missile launcher?

He: (silence)

Me: (getting closer) A Gatlin gun?

He: (silence)

Me: (close enough, but still stumped) So what is it?

He: Log splitter. I have to pee.

JULI-ULI-ULIAN*

(click pic for full effect)

Julian

I have to have one of the coolest grandkids in existence. He’s always loved music and we’ve been dancing since before he could walk. He and JuJu lived with us from his birth until Ju “left us” for Mr. JuJu. Ours was and is a musical household. PD and I were big fans of U2 when Julian was born, as were his mom and Mr. J. So Julian was introduced to Bono and the guys early on. He spent his toddlerhood “being” Bono, complete with the sunglasses and usually with a microphone in his hand. He could perform U2 songs along with the band from having memorized the videos. We’ve got a lot of his “acts” on tape.

Just a little while ago I was playing the Black-Eyed Peas’ Power to the People and Julian and I were dancing. He’s amazing. Like a little, miniature Hip-Hopster. He had his hat on backwards and was bustin’ moves that I can’t even do. I had to call PD in to watch. Going to have to find the get the camcorder out real soon.

He’s making a playlist for me so I can send a Dance Mix home with him.

Oh yeah, I come home from work today and what’s he doing? Re-designing the covers for his Ben 10 dvds.

* my nickname for The Kid.

BIZZY BUSY BIZZEE

I been totally busy the last few days getting our hurricane aftermath house back in order after making our new living room and the guest room for the grandkids.  The little spare room which used to house the monstrous computer desk and all it’s craziness, a single bed, a nightstand, PD’s stereo and a zillion record albums and a couple filing cabinets and about a ton of stuff (some of PD’s sword collection, 45rpm records, cassette tapes, etc.) that just didn’t fit anywhere else now is home to an awesome set of bunkbeds, a desk and a night stand.  So all that other stuff was scattered all over the house and had to find other homes.  That took a lot of creativity, time and trouble to redistribute and/or discard.  It’s pretty much done now except for an odd box here and there, most of which is crowding up our master bedroom.

But anyway, we’re traveling to Erie today to meet up with the JuJu Clan and have dinner and kidnap the grandson, Julian.  He is on Spring Break from school and has opted to spend it here in PA with us.

In other news, Daily Piglet has totally proclaimed her love and devotion to me in a big way for all the world to see.  And I’m planning an elopement with her in the near future

PD and I went yesterday and returned a defective shit-eating router which caused most of the problems that I reported earlier last week.  He decided to install a new one yesterday and of course that required another two hours on the phone for him, one with the router company and one with our ISP because, of course, we are cursed with that Murphy’s Law Plague Thing…  So I had no internet off and on all weekend and some mild anxiety but survived once again. It’s not as if I had nothing to do to fill up my days.

K, we’re off.  I had more to say but it can all wait for another day.

PIC TEST

Just out of curiosity, coupled with my own masochistic tendencies, I’m going to try to post a picture using the new WordPress handy, dandy  “Add Media” option.  This could seriously change my life!  Or send me deeper into the depths of depression… ;-)  Wish me luck.

SERIOUSLY, FOLKS…

I think I was on here Friday and was surprised to see the new WordPress design. I vaguely remember thinking WTF, where did this come from? I also thought I was just on the wrong page and I would wake up and it would all go away.

Well, in the mean time there has been a major upheaval in our household starting with the purchase of bunk beds to put in the little spare room and ending with a couple days of sporadic Internet service and two full days with none at all. I was lucky to get PD’s birthday post up during a teeny window of “on line” time.

Not going into all the details, but we decided to move our main computer and all its components and accessories downstairs. No small feat. After all the furniture rearranging and lugging stuff up and down stairs for what seemed like weeks, it was time to hook up everything. PD is no slouch when it comes to putting wires where they belong. (He can only type with two fingers, but he knows all about hooking shit up.) So after he did all that, we had no DSL. He was a little suspicious of our router which hasn’t performed quite up to par since we bought it and even less stellarly since he beat the crap out of it one day. To make a long story short, hours upon hours of messing with stuff and talking to tech support and the ISP and purchasing a new router and going through the very same BS all over again… only to find out the problem was with the ISP and not us or the router, we are back up and running. Poor PD… on top of the headache he has, he’s got a sore neck from holding the phone on his shoulder and typing with two fingers.

My part in all of this has been nothing more than a sounding board for my poor, distraught husband. Oh, yeah, that and experiencing some serious withdrawal from blogging and IM and email. But I did it. And it’s going to take me awhile to get caught up. So if I owe you mail, hang tight. I’m hoping this was a slow blogging time so I don’t need days to get caught up on reading.

BTW, PD asked me to thank y’all for the nice birthday wishes.

APRIL 7, 1961

After searching a few assorted sites under the heading of “On This Day…” I’ve only come up with a couple of things that happened on this day in 1961, particularly. Those two things are as follows:

~ Tad Szulc (d.2001) wrote a front page NY times article on anti-Castro forces training to fight at Florida bases and predicted a probable invasion on April 18. The invasion took place Apr 17.

~ Marian Jordan (62), radio comedienne (Fibber McGee and Molly), died.

Well, I know something wonderful that happened on that day. I was 5 years old and not aware of much that was going on in the world but since then I’ve learned that my world changed because of what happened that day.

PD was born. Happy Birthday, Buddy!  I Love You

DAILY DOSE

I’m waiting for a couple more responses to the “two groups” question for the sake of drawing some parallels maybe… but in the mean time, I’ll share this little story.

Bit of background first:  You remember the dreaded medication I was on that made me mildly postal AND increased the hot flashes a hundredfold?  Well, George, the doc, wants me to go back on it temporarily, “just to make sure” considering that my biopsy was good and wants to keep it that way.  I’ve resolved myself to having to take the damn things (pills) but name-calling them eases my anxiety (a wee bit) about taking them.

Conversation with PD over dinner last evening…

ME:  I’ve got to start taking those dumb pills again tonight.

PD (trying real hard to be serious):  I thought you took those every day…   (smirk, smirk)

ME:  You bitch.

INTERESTING…

INTERESTING…

Looky what I found…
Russell Crowe singing One Good Year at the 2006 CMAA Awards. I’d heard he could sing and had a band (The Ordinary Fear of God.) I was pleasantly surprised. It’s from the movie One Good Year, which I have not seen.

Incidentally, You Tube loves me again.  This import took less than 5 minutes.

EARTH HOUR

If you are a friend of the Earth, go here.  Do your part

On an unrelated note, I’ve been thinking about this lately… If you had to categorize people into two groups, how would you do it?  I think our answers will tell us a lot about how we view the world.  I’m not giving my answer yet and I’ll ask you to try not to read the other comments so that you’re not influenced by other people’s answers.  I’ll wait until “the Regulars” have responded and maybe we can get an interesting discussion going.  If you’re a lurker, I’m interested in what you have to say too.

Have a good weekend.  We have sunshine today

MAYBE WE’LL JUST DATE…

stereophonics - dakota

So this morning I come on and there’s two of these here… I think You Tube is trying to make up with me after that no-show.

GIVING THE RING BACK

Well, isn’t this just a fine How-dee-doo. I guess you are going to have to exercise your index fingers and go here to watch the video for my favorite song of the week. It seems You Tube is now part of the conspiracy to drive me nutz. Let me know how you like the song. The vid is just ok and the sound quality sucks but it’s a great song. I cranked it today on the way home from work with the sun roof open and the sun shining in. Good time.

I had a truly great Easter weekend with the JuJu Fambly. They came Thursday evening. The kids have grown like crazy since Christmas. Yes, we kept them up too late, what did you think? At one point during the weekend, Maddie, aged two, confessed that she didn’t “yike ham anymore.” Julian (8 years) kept himself busy “riding” the new swivel chair and creating a cold draft in the livingroom. Drew (16 mos.) is just plain too cute and loves to dance with me. Ju gave me a great skincare consultation and Mr. Ju and I regularly fell asleep each time we found ourselves on the new cushy comfy couch.

Our new furniture arrived bright and early Friday morning at 8am. Of course we hadn’t gotten the old furniture moved out yet (who expects furniture movers to be so punctual?) so it was wall to wall furniture; the equivalent of three couches and two large chairs. The new couch has 13 big cushions and 4 pillows. The chair came with 2 big cushions and one smaller one. So the kids had a ball diving and rolling all over the place.

This weekend a friend from high school will be in town so a bunch of us are getting together at a local establishment (read: watering hole) and I’m looking forward to that. There are about 25 of us from my graduating class who get together once or twice a year in between class reunions and we have a really good time. I promise to have at least one funny story to share after. Chances are it will involve a guy named Brad who’s (also) nutz.

Gotta run. Sorry about the video. Blame You Tube…

A LESSON IN PATIENCE

I “ordered” a video from YouTube about a half an hour ago and it’s not here yet so you’re not watching it.  In case it shows up, as it eventually will, before I get back here, its a band called Stereophonics.  The song is Dakota and it’s This Week’s New  Favorite Song for me.  Enjoy it if its here and no cracks about the dudes sunglasses.  I’ll merge this post with it later.

I have about three posts in my head (M+, are you laughing?) and lots to tell so come back soon.

GOOD MORNING

This is a quick one, being that I need to go back to work today after a great 3-day weekend.

So that phone call to the insurance company? Was a breeze! Amazing huh? No menu to wait through, just a minute-long “wait for the next available representative” and then “Mark” came on (I’m going to marry him, Piglet! *wink*) and in less than five minutes and a cartwheel which I didn’t even have to remove my shirt for and I was all taken care of. The guy even had a sense of humor. He asked for my cell number which I don’t know except by letters because I can’t remember the numbers and he laughed when I spelled it out. Looking back now I have no clue why he would need my cell number… but the fact that he actually laughed was an added bonus.

As for the other phone call, from my Dr., George… Now this is where it gets interesting, so sit tight. My biopsy results (which neither of us expected to be good) were not only good but there was an improvement. Now let me tell you. The only explanation for that, the only thing that can account for the improvement is that I’ve been praying like crazy.

K, sorry but I gotta run. We’ll talk later. Have a good one.

WHO IS STEVE HO?

Enjoying my Sunday morning with coffee and myself. Waiting for the sun to come out because dammit, I need sunshine.

Last night I was attempting to go on my Healthcare site and regrettably, was too freakin lazy stubborn to look up my username/password which I couldn’t remember because I so frequently (not) visit my Healthcare site. So I go on and click the Forgot That Important Shit button. They ask you your security question and I typed in my favorite (whatever.) Well, I got it wrong three or five times so they suspended me or my account or some damn thing. Of course I understand this is a safeguard to discourage anyone from trying to access my terribly private member status crap. So now I have to call their help desk tomorrow and find out what to do. I’m guessing it will involve jumping through some hoops and a coupl’a intricate double backward one-handed naked cartwheels and hopefully no bribage. Something I can easily pull off on a 15-minute break at work. Riiiiight. Because no way am I sacrificing my precious lunch half hour on the phone with someone whom I most likely will not be able to understand who will transfer my call to 3 other people, 2 of which I won’t be able to understand. Not to mention a couple of hundred complicated menu options to sit through before I actually do get hooked up with a real voice.

This wouldn’t be a big deal except that I have a procedure (the second follow-up from that one, necessitated by the fact that the meds did not do their magic the last two times) scheduled for after work tomorrow and it would be a pisser to find out that I canceled my own medical insurance and have to end up paying gazillions hundreds of dollars out of my inheritance. pocket. For a procedure that I already know the outcome will not be what I’m hoping for. And more testing and crap will be facilitated and won’t be covered because I’m such a retard I was too lazy to look up my username/password.  Aaaargh.

Please, just let this phone call come off like this: “Oh, jes, Meezez (insert my neem here,) zeese eez eezilee feexed. I feex eet for yoo. No worreez. Ju haff a goot day.”

It’s so fun to be me.

THE ONLY REPLACEMENTS

The Replacements - When It Began

Earlier in the week we were talking about cartoons. I mentioned that a cartoon about the real Replacements would be pretty cool. I went through my video collection and thought this one would serve to give you an idea of just how cool.

The guy on the banjo, Paul Westerberg is my boyfriend. He still gives me goosebumps after all these years. Now that is true love.

Paul, I’ll be ready tonight @ 9. Don’t be late.

Paul: if you’re reading this, just for the record, it’s all in my head.

PD: ditto.

ROBINS HERE, BATMAN

I’ve been all over the place the past few days and my little “Home Away From Home” here was feeling neglected. I was on and off but that jumping thing had me logging out more often than usual. That and Life. And today it was Beautiful Sunshine and warmer temperatures that kept me elsewhere. But I put a new battery in the mouse and it seems to have solved the problem. I can’t read Raggy’s comment now, but I read it before… good one, Ragman

Tuesday in the mail I received 4 birthday cards, an AARP Newsletter and an invitation from a local funeral home to come in and make my burial arrangements (Learn Essential Planning Tips Before it’s too Late!) For anyone not familiar with AARP, that stands for Area Agency for Retired Persons or something. In other words, it’s for Old People.  I do not need to know exactly what that stands for, so don’t even tell me.  I don’t care.

Henceforth, I was unsure whether or not I wished to celebrate my birthday (tomorrow) this year. I’m leaning toward No after that batch of mail. I’m starting to relate to those people who proclaim (gruffly, usually) that it’s “Just Another Day.”

Nah, I’m kidding. I like birthdays. It’s the only day during the year that you can get away with just about anything feel special simply because it is just your day. Today, as a matter of fact, is Melinda’s birthday. Go over there and make her feel special. Melinda, have fun getting away with just about anything

Not sure if I’ll ever get caught up with comments but I’ll try.

STOP WITH THE JUMPING ALREADY

I came here to write an absolutely amazing post.  Maybe my best ever.  But my laptop screen is doing this crazy, freakish jumping thing.  Like my scrollbar developed some kind of seizure disorder or something.  At first, it would stop when I touched the touch pad.  Then after a little while that stopped working.  Hmmm.  Maybe it’s the wireless mouse?  I dunno.  Tell me if you ever had this problem.  Otherwise I’ll have to call the Son and leave voicemail and wait a week for a reply.

I was kidding about the amazing post.  It was just mediocre.  At best.

NOT FUNNY, WALT

Since I am not privileged enough to run with the Big Dogs over at the Peevery, I’m going to post my own miniature version of a Peeve here.

It has come to my attention that Disney has a new cartoon called The Replacements.  If you know me well, you know that my very favorite band is The Replacements (no connection WHATSOEVER) and I’m irritated, to say the least.  Now when I try to google something about my band, I not only have to muddle through and past things like that movie, now there is cartoon crap clogging up my list of sites to click on.

Now I realize that the (band) Replacements are hardly a household name.  And that is only because such a large percentage of the population has never been exposed to their music.  Otherwise, they would be way more famouser and no one would ever think to steal their name for a lame cartoon.  Who would name a cartoon The Beatles, or The Cure or Death Cab for Cutie unless the cartoon was actually about the Beatles, the Cure or Deathcab?

I actually watched about 5 minutes of this cartoon out of curiosity.   Wow.  Yuck.  Disney has lowered it’s standards by a few gazillion points, I think.  The characters seem to be a huge, bloated Elvis-wanna-be, an overly-made up blonde with a broom something up her butt and a couple of obnoxious kids with red hair and hyperactivity issues.  The animation is sub-standard and the cartoon has that loud/ugly quality that so many of them do these days.  Not that I’m a good one to ask, but I do have grandkids.

The least they (Disney) could have done is not name the cartoon after my heroes or maybe make it a watchable cartoon.

Now that I think of it though, a cartoon about the band might have been pretty damn cool.  I’m not going to describe how I would imagine it though, because it would be lost on anyone who isn’t a fan.

K.  I’m done whining.  Er, I mean peeving. There are way bigger issues in this world to be addressed.  But I chose a cartoon.

AM AN INCH?*

I met Jesse when he was about four years old.  He was a really cool little kid.  As he got older, I started giving him riddles to solve.  He was pretty good at them.  I never thought it was necessary to tell him that I am terrible with riddles.  My mind just isn’t logical like that.  And I have a hard time translating abstract things into whatever it is you translate abstract things into.

So now Jesse is 18 years old.  He works in the grocery store where I shop.  Tonight I saw him there, walking toward me with a big smile.  He was on his break.  He gave me a big hug and we spent a little time catching up.  As we were saying our goodbyes and he was walking away, backwards, he said, “Hey Linda, I got a riddle for you.  How long is a Chinaman?“

Before I left the store, he wondered if I had come up with an answer. *No.*  He gave me this hint… The answer is in the question.  But it’s not really a question.

I am stumped.  It is my homework.  I guess I already told you that I never told him I was terrible with riddles.  Please help.  I have to grocery shop again next week!

*It’s a long shot, but I mixed up the letters in Chinaman.

PRAYERS, PLEASE?

My Sweet Leetle Seester Hazel is scheduled to have surgery tomorrow (Tuesday) morning. She’s got a herniated disc and is having that nifty surgery where they go in through your neck and I think, replace the bulging disc with a piece of cadaver bone that acts as a plate. (The link may not be exactly what I was looking for. Time constraints, you know…) You’ll have to forgive me if I don’t have this exactly right. I’m not one to grasp things that make me squeamish. I will be talking to her later hopefully and if this is wrong, I’ll post a correction. I only found out about this last night as Hazel is very stubborn and doesn’t want family members to know she’s been in excrutiating pain for almost a month rather stingy tight-lipped about her personal problems. No, we’re not much alike… And yes, I should call her more often.

Anyway, I asked her if she minded if I posted about the surgery and she laughed and said I could. I know some of her fans read here. So please, keep her in your thoughts today and if you can spare a prayer, it would be appreciated. Thanks. I’ll keep you posted.

Update: Turns out I was pretty close with the link. The procedure Hazel’s having is an Anterior Cervical Discectomy and Fusion. This link gives additional information. Here is a video of the surgery that I found for those of you who get into that sort of thing. Click on the prompt in the upper right hand corner of the page. You’ll have to let me know how it plays out. I, unfortunately, do not fall into that category. I’m also assuming that it may be of a graphic nature, so consider this your warning.

Update update:  As of Tuesday @ 5:40 pm, Hazel’s surgery went fine and she is doing well.  I’m sure she’d love to hear from you.  She’s in ********* Hospital in Rm. **** and her phone number is ***/***/****. 

TICK TICK TICK*

Each weekday I awaken at (somewhere between 5:15 and) 5:30 am. I spend approximately one hour making myself presentable to leave the house and spend 8 hours at my job and then drive home for 15 minutes. So essentially, from the time I go to bed each night… which fluctuates between 10 and 11pm… Eighteen hours are used up for work. I’m counting the 7 or so sleeping hours because I need sleep for work. If I didn’t work, I wouldn’t sleep half that much. So I get approximately 6 waking hours per weekday to take care of non-work crap and attempt to have a life. Subtract about an hour that I spend “winding down” when I get home, usually answering mail and reading blogs. More if I post. Subtract one more hour for dinner. Another for a shower or bath and bed-time prep. A grand total of 3 hours per weeknight. A trip to the grocery store or to take PD on a “movie run” leaves me with about 1 or 2 hours left to myself. If the phone rings, it dwindles more. And there’s pesky things like paying bills or watering plants or emptying trash.

Weekends are for getting caught up. Subtract approximately 14 hours for weekend sleep from 48 hours, that leaves me with 34 hours. Subtract an hour for laundry, 3 for household chores, 3 for shopping/errands, 2 for catching up on friends/family (mail, phone calls,) another 3 for personal hygiene (showers, hair, etc) and 6 hours for meals (prep, eat, clean-up x 6). That’s 18 hours. Subtract that from 34 and you have 16 hours. I figure I have about 20 hours per week, tops, that come under the heading of My Time. That’s out of 168 total hours in a week. (Is that right? It sounds awfully unbalanced to me!) Dear Lord, what if I had kids at home to take care of?

Do I sound greedy? Maybe to some. I know plenty of young mothers who would kill for a couple hours a week to have for themselves. But, geeze, I did that already. I remember how glorious it felt to get everyone in bed at night just to have some quiet time, too exhausted to enjoy it. But I’m past those years. It’s just me and PD here, not even a pet to take care of and I can’t find the time to do what I really enjoy.

If I didn’t have to work I would:

~Bake fresh bread. Often. ~Make a quilt. ~Make all my greeting cards. ~Read more. ~Visit my mom and family more. ~My house would sparkle. ~I would get back to my Poetry Group. ~I would paint. ~I would cook more. ~I would exercise like a fiend. ~All my old photographs would be in albums. In order. ~I would plant fantastic gardens. ~I would take road trips. Often. ~I would do lunch with the girls. ~Balance my checkbook. ~Organize files. ~Rearrange furniture. Often.

I wouldn’t know how to act. And no one would recognize me because I would be deliriously happy and yeah, I know what you’re thinking…

I’d find something else to bitch about. Oh yeah? Just give me the chance and I could prove you wrong.

* this is boring as hell. don’t even bother reading.  what? you didn’t see the asterisk???  aw… pay attention next time! 

TALK TO ME

Was reading through some of my old posts when I still used Blogger. This post seemed to get a lot of comments. It seems that people who read blogs like to talk about themselves. Fancy that. So I decided to re-post part of that post and let y’all do the talking today.

1) What item would you choose to put into a time capsule that would best represent you?
2) What is your favorite slow-dance song?
3) How many pillows do you sleep with?
4) What’s your favorite euphemism for “making out”?
5) What color are your eyes?

Now git busy…

*************************************************

Added later:  wtf … Now, in my Top Clicks box there is a “file” link that is the entire photo which I referred to yesterday, the hyphen being a cropped version of the photo.   Did I grant someone blog administrator rights during a drunken stupor or something?  Stay tuned for the next installment of MY BLOG HAS A LIFE OF IT’S OWN*

*and it’s undermining my sanity!