Absence Makes Things Different

Was kind of surprised to log in here and a) see new comments and b) SEE ADS ON MY BLOG PAGE.  This is the kind of thing that sneaks up on you when you’re not paying attention.  Like old age and worn out underwear.

Anyway, it looks junky and I don’t like it but I’m not sure if I really care or not and I certainly don’t have the inclination right this minute to start clicking around to see if there is anything I can do about it.  I’m just coming down off a 48-hour work week that I’m not accustomed to working and my body and my brain are both screaming for a break.

You might be surprised that a mere 8 hours out of your week can feel like you lost a couple of days worth of time.  It’s gonna take me an entire weekend to get caught up with my neglected things.

Now that I think of it, that’s like losing an entire night’s sleep.  Or for me, two of ‘em.  Bllerrrggghhh.

COUSIN

 My cousin died this morning.

 

  I’m having a really hard time processing this.

 

  My cousin has been struggling with a bi-polar disorder for most of her life. She’s been in and out of hospitals and much of her life has been a living hell. She’s struggled to keep a marriage together, managed to raise two amazing kids and has been a chain-smoker for as long as I can remember.  

  She and I shared a closeness despite the fact that we’ve only been together a few times in our lives, due to the fact that she’s always lived in a different state. We’d met when we were little wee and a handful of other times, mostly at family weddings or funerals.  The last time we were together was at a family reunion a ton of years ago. She and I took a long walk together and spoke of Life and Family and things of that nature. We were like-minded, kindred souls. We shared a birthday.

  And now, all I can think about is that, despite all her struggles, the pain that she lived with… how her family dealt with her dark times, the unexplained silences and frustrations of never being able to make her happy… now they are making funeral arrangements and saying goodbye.

  A month or so ago, her brother told me she had cancer. When I asked him how she was dealing with the news, he told me that she was so medicated that she probably wasn’t even truly aware of what was going on.  I decided that it was a blessing, of sorts.  And yet it all seemed so unfair to me.  As far as I knew, she and her husband had patched up some rough spots and relocated to another state, bought a house and were attempting to start a new life together in a new climate with new surroundings.

  But I hadn’t had the time to put together my thoughts and feelings enough to contact her and let her know I loved her and that I would be there for her.  I’d told her during our walk at that family reunion years ago that I said a prayer for her every day. She was genuinely touched by that sentiment and thanked me with all her heart. I’ve continued to do that all these years and I see now that all those prayers added up to precisely not much of anything at all.  

  I wonder if even for a split second, she thought of me before her last breath. If she could feel that I cared or that I’ll always keep her in my heart and that I cherish the memories of times we spent together. I should have told her.

  I should have made the time.

Home Saturday Night…

… listening to this

Video

Home Saturday Night…

… listening to this

Gravity, Interrupted.

Prompted by an excellent piece by my good friend and author, Harry Ramble, I wish to share a short countenance that is stored in my memory as one of the first dates I had with PD.

PD’s father owned a camp a couple of hours from here.  It was in a beautiful and secluded wooded area and would make an excellent place to invite a beautiful woman for a nice weekend escape and PD, being no dummy, did that very thing.  And I accepted.

New to this whole “camp” scenario, I didn’t know that the propane tanks which enable cooking and heating inside the camp would be stored in a shed off to the edge of the property, probly about  twenty feet from the camp itself. C’mon. I was a city girl long before I became a country girl… At any rate, the shed had been built amid a blind of pine trees.  Very. Tall. Pine. Trees.  It was dark in the shed. I don’t remember if there was electricity in there, but I stood outside under the pines while PD unlocked the padlock on the door of the shed and stepped inside.  I was to find out later that the loud whooshing sound I heard was from the air escaping the tank when he opened the valve to turn on the propane.  It was quite startling since I did not expect the noise.  AND it was loud. Evidently the squirrel in the tree must have been at least as startled as I was because, mid-whoosh, he dove straight down out of the tree  like a furry gray torpedo  and landed  directly on my head for a second or two… his tiny paws scrambling around in my hair to get his footing long enough to dive yet again.  This time, to the ground and he shot off into the woods, most likely to a backwoods version of Urgi-Care to have a full cardio work-up to make sure he wasn’t having a heart attack. Me? I would never relax outside the confines of my own home, ever again.

Maybe a better title for this post may have been “Squirrel, Interrupted…”

Plead for Patience

I am embarrassed that I left you guys hanging here since my last posting.

Long story short, I got my passport.

Long story long, I’m getting to it. I promise. And I hope it will be soon. Life tends to get crazy sometimes over here.

Video

Most Favoritest Televised Musical Performance Ever

Can’t Hardly Wait by mmr421

Catch Up

This is gonna be quick. If I don’t post right this minute, I don’t know when I’ll ever get the time so here goes.

This has been a wild and crazy summer so far. Back to back things going on and not a lot of time to breathe in between.  But here’s the best part. Forgive me if you already know all this because I’ve been shouting it from the rooftops posting bits and pieces of my good fortune all over the internet the past month or so.

At the end of the month I’m going to be able to cross three items off my Bucket List.  One item in particular was a complete and utter fantasy because I didn’t think it was possible, that being SEEING THE REPLACEMENTS.  Since they sort of split up (parted ways and have not performed together since) in 1991, fans of the band only dared to dream that they would ever reunite.  As fate would have it, they are doing the Riot Fest tour this summer in Denver, Chicago and Toronto.

Long story short (my bedtime, I HATE Sunday nights) I’m going on a road trip with my daughter to Toronto to see The Replacements perform ALIVE AND IN PERSON.  And those three things are all on my Bucket List.

Now, if my passport only arrives in time, I’ll be all set.  Another story for another time.

Anyone? Testing, testing… 1 2 3

Anyone besides Mark having trouble commenting here?  If you are, which means you can’t, shake your head real hard so I can see you.

Otherwise, email me and let me know, ’cause I gotta find out what’s going on here.  Just in case I write another post someday and you want to respond…

onewinkatatime@hotmail dot com

Finally Happened

I’ve been following a band called Runaway Dorothy online for a couple of years. If you are my friend on Facebook, you’ve surely seen me post about them. The thing is/was, one of the band members, Dave Parnell had a blog at one time and I read it faithfully. I tried to be as supportive as I could when the band was struggling.  Dave is very personable and often answered my comments. I grew to have a great deal of respect for him as well as a very healthy appreciation for the band’s music. Click here for an example of why I fell in love with the music. And here for an album review of The Arc, their first cd.

Recently I was thrilled to find that the band was on tour and was looking for a venue somewhere between Brooklyn, NY and Youngstown, OH. They were interested in Philadelphia and Pittsburgh.  Of course I was crossing my fingers for Pittsburgh.  And it happened.  They booked a show for this past Friday night at the Hard Rock Cafe in Pittsburgh.  I grabbed the first friend who showed an interest in going and we were gonna do it.

I should probly mention, and I hope if Dave reads this, he’s not embarrassed, but I have a healthy, um, crush on his disheveled  boyish charm.  He’s ridiculously talented, both as a performer and a songwriter. His lyrics have depth and meaning and you can tell right off that he’s got heart. If you know me at all, you know I’m big on heart.  If you don’t have heart, I don’t bother much with you at all… He’s also got determination and spirit.  I’m pretty darn sure you could say this about each and every member of the band but I’m guilty of paying a little more attention to Dave.  I’d adopt him. Heck, I’d adopt the whole darn band.

So, before this turns into War and Peace, I’ll tell you… My friend Brooke and I went to the cafe. She’s shy, I’m not. (DUH) There were to be 3 bands performing.  Before RD got there, I’d already talked to the lead guy, Mike from Band #3. Yeah, he had heart. I wish I could remember the name of the band :/ The first band up was called Blue Light Bandits.  They’re from Boston and I liked them a lot.  They had a kind of Jack Johnson sound to them.  And they thought I was in my forties so, yeah… Brownie Points.

Brooke and I were sitting at our table and I happened to look up and saw a messy mop of brown hair atop a plaid shirt (Dave Parnell’s signature style)  walking past. I said, “Dave.” He ambled a couple of more steps.  I repeated his name, a little louder the second time.  He turned and our eyes met. My heart soared. That face… A smile slowly spread across it (his face) and he made his way to our table. He has the most beautiful teeth I’ve ever seen on a guy. I was out of my chair in a second and stopped a foot in front of him. I said, “It’s me, Linda.” I don’t know even now if I had to tell him or not and I’m not sure if I held out my hand or just dove in straight for the hug, but we broke into an easy conversation. He had been heading toward the facilities (after 6 hours in a 15-passenger van) and asked that we wait a minute and said that he wanted to take us back to meet the rest of the band, was that ok?  WAS THAT OK?  Silly Dave.

Soon he came back and motioned us to follow him to a private dining area around behind the bar. On the way I asked if we were going to the Green Room. Haha Linda, you are so funnee.

We walked in to find Brett (Dave’s brother,) Sammy and Evan, as well as their manager Nick and 2 or 3 fan/friends from Pittsburgh. Amazingly polite and perfect gentlemen, they made us feel completely comfortable immediately. Two of them mentioned recognizing me from my comments on their fan page. Their manager, Nick was immediately at my elbow, asking what I had and what I needed.  At first I wasn’t sure what he meant but then I realized he meant band souvenirs, etc. I told him I had the shirt, the buttons, stickers, cd, etc. He asked me to leave my address and that he’d get some more stuff off to me. How cool was that?  So we talked awhile and the first band was up to play so we excused ourselves and went back to our table.

Their performance was even better than I expected.  And later I found out that Dave had been on cold meds for a week. Sheesh.

Third song in, (With You) I was pleasantly surprised to hear Dave say, “This next song I want to dedicate to a friend of a couple years who I’m meeting for the first time tonight,” and he looked up at me. (omg) “This is for Linda, something something…” I couldn’t make out and forgot to ask him what it was. Was awesome anyway.

There was more to the night but I don’t want your eyes to cross.  Among those things:

  • I was appointed House Mother to the band.  Which sounds a whole lot more respectable than Honorary Oldest Groupie, don’t you think?
  • I’ve offered to provide lodging for them next time they’re in the ‘Burgh and they accepted on the condition that PD make them a Spinach Quiche for their breakfast.
  • The crush I have on Dave has spread to the entire group.
  • If you don’t own any Runaway Dorothy music, your library is lacking.  Their new cd coming out, The Wait promises to be something you’ll want to own.  I will.  Here’s a sneak peek at a song from the album called Hurry.
  • You can go on FB and Like the band and get to know them a whole lot better and you’ll be lucky like me :)

So, that was my Friday night.  Was a great time and I can’t wait for it to happen again.  Thanks Runaway Dorothy!  Love you guys :)