I’m feeling some pressure to post something here, even though I have virtually nothing of value or interest to share. This has probly happened only a couple of times since I started blogging. That’s frightening to me. What if I wake up some day and REALLY don’t have ANYTHING to say???!!!
Speaking of frightening, this morning on my way to work, something off to the right of my dashboard caught my eye. Of all things, my passenger airbag warning light flicked on and off a couple of times, completely freaking me out. All I could imagine was an airbag deploying as I was driving at 60mph. (Yeah, so… it was in a 45… it was 5:30 in the morning and no other cars were on the road. Just some assorted colorful roadkill. And the threat of driving with the Hindenberg in my face was enough to slow me down. So shut up.) Turns out, the tote bag I tossed on the seat next to me was heavier than usual, tricking my seat sensor into believing that the seat was actually occupied. Thanks for figuring that out for me JuJu. Your beauty is surpassed only by your intellect and deductive reasoning skills. (did i word that right? you know what I mean.)
Speaking of JuJu, she and her family are coming to visit for the weekend and I CAN’T WAIT. I promise to have pictures.
But now I must begin preparing for bed. Why do I need to prepare for bed you ask? Have I ever shared my ridiculous bed-time ritual/routine with you? Let me do that now. I’m not going to be neat or grammatical or chronological or anything cause I’m in a hurry. Before bed, this is the checklist that I go through in my brain. And usually I actually accomplish most of it. This is how I spend from 9pm to whenever, most nights. Here goes:
Make sure phone is charged. Make sure iPod is charged. Put breakfast bar, snacks, current magazine reading and iPod in tote. Put wallet and sunglasses, etc. in whichever purse I’m carrying. Fill Senseo up with water and coffee pod. Lock lid and put mug in place. Toss a bottle of water in the freezer. Check email one more time and shut down laptop (done either before or after shower depending on degree of tiredness. Before, if tiredness > 8.0) Shower. Confer with PD briefly on whether AC is coming on to determine what sleeping attire is called for. (Opt for buff, T-shirt and boxers or flannel-lined and dress accordingly. Or not.) Remove contacts and apply special anti-aging eye cream (thanks, Ju…) and quick slather of facial tanner-moisturizer. Wash hands thoroughly to prevent orange palms and fingernails. Lotion on legs, neck area and elbows and hands. Flail hands wildly to dry so I can set 2 alarms and one cellphone alarm. Throw phone under pillow. Position bedroom window to allow for night breeze if no AC on. If AC on, throw extra blanket on bed. Push button on CD player for night time serenade of Miserere, repeat all. Run down stairs to retrieve forgotten water bottle from freezer. Kiss PD goodnight and have short conversation consisting of “Love you, thanks for dinner, sleep well, sweet dreams, “happy whatever-the-next-day-is” and anything last-minute that needs discussing.” Fall, exhausted, into bed. Position multitude of pillows appropriately and place partially-frozen bottle of water on coaster on night stand beside fan for midnight sweat attacks. Dig around under pillows for reading material and get comfortable. Read one chapter. Bury book under pillows, turn off bedside lamp. Proceed to commence prayers and hope to get through list of petitions. If I’m lucky I remember everything, but usually don’t. Nine times out of ten I have to go back downstairs to take a pill or wash my travel mug. Both of which I forgot in my list. See?
So there you have it, or most of it anyway. Goodnight. I’m running behind.